Dear My Dear friend Mr. Procrastination,
It is me, Steven. I know I have not written in a while but I thought it was time for a letter from me to you. Now, I know you are a whole lot better at visiting me then I am with returning your visits but as you know, I am busy. I love when you come to stay with me, don't get me wrong. I mean, who does not enjoy a visit from you. You are one of the most popular people on campuses around the world!
You bring the fun!
The only problem I have with you is that when you do come and you sidetrack me, like you are known for, you make me think of things I rather not think about. Recently you visited me and I was right in the middle of a conversation with another close friend of mine, Mr. Caffeine. He and I were on a total streak of getting things done and then out of no where you come and ruin a perfectly good train of thought.
More recently then that you made me look at myself and reflect on my image as a person. At first it started out great! You reminded me I was good looking, how I love to design, and how much I love my friends and family. Then, as always, you had to bring up all the negatives...now I am stuck. You left me right in the middle of thinking about something negative about myself and you left me! How could you? Now, I am stuck on these thoughts and cannot get it out of my head. I think of how I am juvenile in my humor, how I cannot spell or speak very well, how I do not have any plan of post graduate work, & most of all how I act when I do not know what I want...you show me how much I dwell on situations that go wrong.
I hate you procrastination.
It seems you have come back. Not to get ride of these over dramatic ridiculous thoughts but to tell me how writing in this blog is more important then writing a paper that is due soon.
I know you'll never go away. So, if you do not mind, as quickly as you come please exit in the same way.
Thanks.
Respectfully,
Steven
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Here today, gone tomorrow.
August 13th, 1988 a day that will be forever remembered by me.
Why?
It is my birthday! Not just any birthday but my 21st birthday. Now, I know exactly what you are thinking: "What will I drink first?" Well, to answer your fake hypothetical question, I will be drinking a strong cold glass of reality. All the flavor of fake reality, but none of the calories!
Being semi-clear for a moment, I took this time in my life to think about friends. We meet people every day! What sets people apart? Why isn't everyone a friend to every one else? Well, that is because we are in reality, not fakeville population: day dreamers. I am not apposed to day dreaming, being a level 45 day dreamer myself, but I am just saying why do we meet people just to have them ripped out of our lives a short while later?
I have to come to the conclusion that, it is going to happen! People are going to be ripped out of your life, people are going to come and go. It is important to enjoy the time you have with said friends while you can. Have a few laughs, cry with them, love your brother/sister in Christ! I think that if you think of it like that then meeting people is all worth it. If you are lucky enough to meet a select few friends that stay with you, your entire life, well then you are a blessed person.
I consider myself one of the most blessed people on earth. Tonight I had an amazing dinner and conversation, I will sleep with a roof over my head, and I will dream when I sleep. Tomorrow when I wake up I will be 21. Who knows what else will happen, and the people I will meet.
I leave you with a famous quote from one of the best books ever written:
"Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to great places!
You're off and away!"
-Dr. Seuss 'Oh, the Places You'll Go!'
Yours legally,
Steven
Why?
It is my birthday! Not just any birthday but my 21st birthday. Now, I know exactly what you are thinking: "What will I drink first?" Well, to answer your fake hypothetical question, I will be drinking a strong cold glass of reality. All the flavor of fake reality, but none of the calories!
Being semi-clear for a moment, I took this time in my life to think about friends. We meet people every day! What sets people apart? Why isn't everyone a friend to every one else? Well, that is because we are in reality, not fakeville population: day dreamers. I am not apposed to day dreaming, being a level 45 day dreamer myself, but I am just saying why do we meet people just to have them ripped out of our lives a short while later?
I have to come to the conclusion that, it is going to happen! People are going to be ripped out of your life, people are going to come and go. It is important to enjoy the time you have with said friends while you can. Have a few laughs, cry with them, love your brother/sister in Christ! I think that if you think of it like that then meeting people is all worth it. If you are lucky enough to meet a select few friends that stay with you, your entire life, well then you are a blessed person.
I consider myself one of the most blessed people on earth. Tonight I had an amazing dinner and conversation, I will sleep with a roof over my head, and I will dream when I sleep. Tomorrow when I wake up I will be 21. Who knows what else will happen, and the people I will meet.
I leave you with a famous quote from one of the best books ever written:
"Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to great places!
You're off and away!"
-Dr. Seuss 'Oh, the Places You'll Go!'
Yours legally,
Steven
Monday, July 13, 2009
The Bible talks about Sex. So why can't I?
God knows how to tug on my heart. Here is a look at one part of my Bible reading thus far:
It has seem that this summer God has been pushing my buttons as far as reading his work and applying it to my life. I skip a day of reading the Bible and I find myself in a funk, unable to do anything until I read a bit of his word. This is a good thing right? Right!...well, for the average person. I really find myself reading, understanding and getting a bit confrontational after I have "digested" his word. Example:
Recently I have been going back and reading, re-reading, reading again...and again etc. 1Corinthians 12:20.
What's wring with 1 Corinthians? Paul is writing a letter to Corinth from Ephesus in Asia minor.
He is writing all about sexual immorality. A hot and heavy topic that I, for whatever reason, can not seem to understand why God would have had this specific set of instructions for us. It says "Flee from sexual immorality." Flee! Other translations say "Run" and "Go". How many times have you heard someone say "Pray about the pornography problem" don't run away from the sin, anything is possible if you stand up with the power of prayer! I am not sure because I am not you but I know I have heard pastor's (not grouping them in one category) say stand up for what is right!
Here Paul is saying 'get the heck out' FLEE! GO! RUN! from sexual immorality. Don't pray about it...don't hope that goes away..."φεύγετε" is the Greek word and another time that this word shows up is in Matthew 10:23 when Matthew says, "When they persecute you in one town FLEE (φεύγετε) to the next..."
So Paul would like me, not having ownership of my body, to flee from sexual immorality (or fornication) I understand that, but I do not...at the same time. I did not think God wanted us to run anything since he is our rock!...but in this case he does. I find this very interesting. Now, myself, I have not gotten into serious sexual trouble (thank you God for running legs) but what does "saving" myself mean to God? Does it mean kissing? Holding hands. This sexual immorality runs deeper than just a normal "surface sin" but Paul says, "Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body"...wow.
I think that I am stuck on this one verse especially because Paul sets aside one sin as different than every other sin we commit! Sexual immorality is seen as deeper than skin and should be treated like a plague it seems like, since we should flee from it. He goes on to say it is a different sin since the Holy Spirit dwells (or lives) in us. This makes sense...
I feel like if we all had a consistent reminder that the Holy Spirit lives in us at all times then we would not be so quick to watch that movie, or think about the girl we saw at the mall...or whatever. You get the picture.
Paul finishes by saying "So glorify God in your body." In our very bodies we are supposed to glorify God! Have any of us really done this! Have we said "I am making a conscience effort not to abstain from ALL sexually immoral things to fully glorify God? No. Unfortunately, we all sin and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Praise God for this! We know the price that we were bought at...and that has made all the difference. This does not mean we should pull out our favorite Sex on tape audio book or go on that adult site we know about...that means we try our hardest...through prayer...and fleeing from sexual immorality in thought and in deed no matter how hard to glorify God. We try our hardest because of what He has done for us.
This probably made little to no sense but I wanted to let other bloggers know what I am studying and the conclusions I have made after much though, talk, and prayer.
As always, sorry for the poor grammar and poor spelling.
humbly,
Steven
It has seem that this summer God has been pushing my buttons as far as reading his work and applying it to my life. I skip a day of reading the Bible and I find myself in a funk, unable to do anything until I read a bit of his word. This is a good thing right? Right!...well, for the average person. I really find myself reading, understanding and getting a bit confrontational after I have "digested" his word. Example:
Recently I have been going back and reading, re-reading, reading again...and again etc. 1Corinthians 12:20.
What's wring with 1 Corinthians? Paul is writing a letter to Corinth from Ephesus in Asia minor.
He is writing all about sexual immorality. A hot and heavy topic that I, for whatever reason, can not seem to understand why God would have had this specific set of instructions for us. It says "Flee from sexual immorality." Flee! Other translations say "Run" and "Go". How many times have you heard someone say "Pray about the pornography problem" don't run away from the sin, anything is possible if you stand up with the power of prayer! I am not sure because I am not you but I know I have heard pastor's (not grouping them in one category) say stand up for what is right!
Here Paul is saying 'get the heck out' FLEE! GO! RUN! from sexual immorality. Don't pray about it...don't hope that goes away..."φεύγετε" is the Greek word and another time that this word shows up is in Matthew 10:23 when Matthew says, "When they persecute you in one town FLEE (φεύγετε) to the next..."
So Paul would like me, not having ownership of my body, to flee from sexual immorality (or fornication) I understand that, but I do not...at the same time. I did not think God wanted us to run anything since he is our rock!...but in this case he does. I find this very interesting. Now, myself, I have not gotten into serious sexual trouble (thank you God for running legs) but what does "saving" myself mean to God? Does it mean kissing? Holding hands. This sexual immorality runs deeper than just a normal "surface sin" but Paul says, "Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body"...wow.
I think that I am stuck on this one verse especially because Paul sets aside one sin as different than every other sin we commit! Sexual immorality is seen as deeper than skin and should be treated like a plague it seems like, since we should flee from it. He goes on to say it is a different sin since the Holy Spirit dwells (or lives) in us. This makes sense...
I feel like if we all had a consistent reminder that the Holy Spirit lives in us at all times then we would not be so quick to watch that movie, or think about the girl we saw at the mall...or whatever. You get the picture.
Paul finishes by saying "So glorify God in your body." In our very bodies we are supposed to glorify God! Have any of us really done this! Have we said "I am making a conscience effort not to abstain from ALL sexually immoral things to fully glorify God? No. Unfortunately, we all sin and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Praise God for this! We know the price that we were bought at...and that has made all the difference. This does not mean we should pull out our favorite Sex on tape audio book or go on that adult site we know about...that means we try our hardest...through prayer...and fleeing from sexual immorality in thought and in deed no matter how hard to glorify God. We try our hardest because of what He has done for us.
This probably made little to no sense but I wanted to let other bloggers know what I am studying and the conclusions I have made after much though, talk, and prayer.
As always, sorry for the poor grammar and poor spelling.
humbly,
Steven
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Funny way of thinking
Recently Norm McDonald appeared on the newly hosted late night talk show "Late Night with Conan O'Brien". I do not know if any of you saw that episode but if you did then you know that Norm went on and was simply hysterical!
I will not drag this on anymore then it has to...Norm McDonald said a joke that I thought was really funny and if you have Facebook or just like to stalk me, then you read it as my status. Here it is:
"There are a lot of ships that are very valuable. You would probably think a golden ship was valuable right? or a solid platinum ship. A ship made only of diamonds, I don't know if it would float, I don't know, but you would think that would be the most valuable ship right? But you know what Sir it is not! You know what your most valuable ship is? Friendship."
I laughed for about 20 min. because of the way he said the joke and delivered the punch line.
Now, this "joke" the more I thought about it became something more! It got me thinking that I need to be thankful for my friends.
I know I like hanging out with a lot of people and I might have talked to a lot of you one on one but I wish more of my friends knew how I feel about them.
I appreciate them. I care for them. I pray for them.
When you hurt, I hurt. I really mean this. Even if you would consider our relationship more of an acquaintance status that is fine because everyone I meet has a special spot in my thoughts.
I am a people person and if there is one thing God has shown me so far this summer is that I like to meet and interact with people. I see this as a big gift but also something I should be aware of as to not hurt people.
It is late now and I think I will be going to bed. This is just a thought and I wanted to write it down for people to know and so I would not forget to be thankful. I am very thankful for a lot of things...tonight I am especially thankful for my friends.
Trying to stay friendly,
Steven
I will not drag this on anymore then it has to...Norm McDonald said a joke that I thought was really funny and if you have Facebook or just like to stalk me, then you read it as my status. Here it is:
"There are a lot of ships that are very valuable. You would probably think a golden ship was valuable right? or a solid platinum ship. A ship made only of diamonds, I don't know if it would float, I don't know, but you would think that would be the most valuable ship right? But you know what Sir it is not! You know what your most valuable ship is? Friendship."
I laughed for about 20 min. because of the way he said the joke and delivered the punch line.
Now, this "joke" the more I thought about it became something more! It got me thinking that I need to be thankful for my friends.
I know I like hanging out with a lot of people and I might have talked to a lot of you one on one but I wish more of my friends knew how I feel about them.
I appreciate them. I care for them. I pray for them.
When you hurt, I hurt. I really mean this. Even if you would consider our relationship more of an acquaintance status that is fine because everyone I meet has a special spot in my thoughts.
I am a people person and if there is one thing God has shown me so far this summer is that I like to meet and interact with people. I see this as a big gift but also something I should be aware of as to not hurt people.
It is late now and I think I will be going to bed. This is just a thought and I wanted to write it down for people to know and so I would not forget to be thankful. I am very thankful for a lot of things...tonight I am especially thankful for my friends.
Trying to stay friendly,
Steven
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Sitting in silence, yes please.
Dear sir or madam,
As you know, or maybe you do not, I am in Hartford City for a month. I arrived yesterday and thought it was awesome! I did not have a care in the world and I knew I was going to enjoy this peace and quite.
I was wrong.
Not 24 hrs. later and I can't think straight! It is so quite. I am living with 5 house mates (2 of whom are gone, one until tonight, one until Wednesday), one is sleeping, and one left in the morning and has yet to return. As any good go-getter I decided to take this rare opportunity and get some "art stuff" done. Nope, did not happen.
I played guitar hero, went on facebook for 2 hours, and did absolutely NOTHING. I am sitting here and wanted to just hear a voice! The only thing I am hearing is a fan blowing, the typing of my key board, and the random car that goes by, you know, that broken muffler sound.
I should probably draw, or paint, or something productive. I am simply writing this to pass the time really. I hope people reply so that I may read it, laugh, and waste more time.
Anyway, I start my internship Monday at 9am and I am a bit nervous really but I know I will do a great job and then travel down to Tennessee...one month from now. Seems like a while.
Until then I cherish not waking up at 6am to babies crying, not taking a dog out only to have her poop in the house, and hearing constant noise.
I will try and enjoy the silence.
Quietly,
Steven
As you know, or maybe you do not, I am in Hartford City for a month. I arrived yesterday and thought it was awesome! I did not have a care in the world and I knew I was going to enjoy this peace and quite.
I was wrong.
Not 24 hrs. later and I can't think straight! It is so quite. I am living with 5 house mates (2 of whom are gone, one until tonight, one until Wednesday), one is sleeping, and one left in the morning and has yet to return. As any good go-getter I decided to take this rare opportunity and get some "art stuff" done. Nope, did not happen.
I played guitar hero, went on facebook for 2 hours, and did absolutely NOTHING. I am sitting here and wanted to just hear a voice! The only thing I am hearing is a fan blowing, the typing of my key board, and the random car that goes by, you know, that broken muffler sound.
I should probably draw, or paint, or something productive. I am simply writing this to pass the time really. I hope people reply so that I may read it, laugh, and waste more time.
Anyway, I start my internship Monday at 9am and I am a bit nervous really but I know I will do a great job and then travel down to Tennessee...one month from now. Seems like a while.
Until then I cherish not waking up at 6am to babies crying, not taking a dog out only to have her poop in the house, and hearing constant noise.
I will try and enjoy the silence.
Quietly,
Steven
Monday, June 1, 2009
David Blaine: The most ridiculous human ever to exist.
Good Lord in heaven, is this guy mental?
For those of you who have been living in a hole for the past 10 years of your life, there is a man running around doing witchcraft, black magic, and slight-of-hand tricks...AND PEOPLE ARE PAYING HIM!
Let me explain myself.
I am a pretty open guy and love magic, just like the next guy but if you ever watched David Blaine street magic (or any other specials surrounding his dark soul) you will quickly realize what this man does is pure, unadulterated magic. Real magic! I know, I know many of you (hopefully many people) are reading this and wondering if I am being serious. Well, wonder no more! I am being 100% serious. I don't believe in real magic, or even that it really exists but I do believe in Satan and I believe people sell their soul and I truly believe this man has done this. There is no other explanation!
Last night I was up rather late (like I usually am) and he had a special on where Mr. Blaine went to Haiti. He decided it was a good idea to go to a place where they are under constant spiritual warfare and do magic in front of people. He made a lot of natives angry and one guy screamed at him and called him a "Black Devil". Way to go Haitian native.
Also, I should say that these "tricks" that he does are not coins in your ear trick, pretending to take off your index finger, or even poke your eye and spill cream everywhere. No, he does tricks where he will stick his tongue out poke a pen through it and make a little kid cry. He also guessed a woman's ex husband's name and told her he knew he cheated on her and made her cry. They should call his act, "I'll make you cry and get paid for it". Last example (promise). He guessed a girls card and made it move to her shoe and then ripped it up and assembled it right before her eyes and camera. I can't describe 100% of his trick like this...trust me though:
Evil man+fun trick+crying people=David Blaine.
He can make a real tattoo appear on your body and the next second (literally) make it vanish with a rubber eraser. No human can do that. He takes fun childish magic to the next level. If that does not say devil I don't know what does.
All that I have mentioned I do really feel strong about...but boy does he put on a good magic show.
My prediction: By 2021 David Blaine and Oprah will have a baby. His name you ask?
Beelzebub Winfrey-Blaine (buy Garlic, Holy water, and a wooden steak just in case)
Watching out for David Blaine,
Steven
For those of you who have been living in a hole for the past 10 years of your life, there is a man running around doing witchcraft, black magic, and slight-of-hand tricks...AND PEOPLE ARE PAYING HIM!
Let me explain myself.
I am a pretty open guy and love magic, just like the next guy but if you ever watched David Blaine street magic (or any other specials surrounding his dark soul) you will quickly realize what this man does is pure, unadulterated magic. Real magic! I know, I know many of you (hopefully many people) are reading this and wondering if I am being serious. Well, wonder no more! I am being 100% serious. I don't believe in real magic, or even that it really exists but I do believe in Satan and I believe people sell their soul and I truly believe this man has done this. There is no other explanation!
Last night I was up rather late (like I usually am) and he had a special on where Mr. Blaine went to Haiti. He decided it was a good idea to go to a place where they are under constant spiritual warfare and do magic in front of people. He made a lot of natives angry and one guy screamed at him and called him a "Black Devil". Way to go Haitian native.
Also, I should say that these "tricks" that he does are not coins in your ear trick, pretending to take off your index finger, or even poke your eye and spill cream everywhere. No, he does tricks where he will stick his tongue out poke a pen through it and make a little kid cry. He also guessed a woman's ex husband's name and told her he knew he cheated on her and made her cry. They should call his act, "I'll make you cry and get paid for it". Last example (promise). He guessed a girls card and made it move to her shoe and then ripped it up and assembled it right before her eyes and camera. I can't describe 100% of his trick like this...trust me though:
Evil man+fun trick+crying people=David Blaine.
He can make a real tattoo appear on your body and the next second (literally) make it vanish with a rubber eraser. No human can do that. He takes fun childish magic to the next level. If that does not say devil I don't know what does.
All that I have mentioned I do really feel strong about...but boy does he put on a good magic show.
My prediction: By 2021 David Blaine and Oprah will have a baby. His name you ask?
Beelzebub Winfrey-Blaine (buy Garlic, Holy water, and a wooden steak just in case)
Watching out for David Blaine,
Steven
Thursday, April 2, 2009
A letter to God.
To whom it may concern,
Two decades or 240 months or 1,043 weeks or 7, 304 days or 175,316 hours or 602,692,013 minutes. Whatever way you slice it, I have been on this rock for twenty years now and I just have to say, "What the heck!". I did not sign up for this.
Let me back up for a bit. As you know, sir, I am in college and I stress out over the most littlest things. I ask for comfort but you know me to well, so you give what seems like a wee bit of comfort but it seems like you test me so I may grow...or depend on you more. Blah! It is like eating Brussels Sprouts and some fat guy busts a hole in your wall smacks you in the face with his sausage linked hands and says "Here is a bill for inconveniencing me!". I know this is not making any sense, sir, but I really can't understand it.
I thought I was entering college to be a pharmacist, make lots of money, and live in a 3 story house. But you came in brought me to the art department and said "He you go." So I am a graphics major. Now, I am not complaining about the thing I live and breath but am just saying what a change! This brings me to this letter.
It's all about the thing I love. I live, eat, breath graphic design. How is it that I don't think I am good at it. I ask for your guidance, you give it to me, yet I still feel an emptiness. Is that a sign sir? Am I supposed to go and do something else?
You see I find it quite difficult to imagine what your plan is for me. Here are things I wrestle with:
-What will I do for the rest of my time here?
-Why can't I ever think of the right thing to say?
-Why don't I shine anymore, like I did when I became a Christian?
-Who will I marry...or will I stay single forever?
-Why is it I never get good grades on anything?
I can't juggle. I am funny but not ridiculously funny. I don't have any real talent. I have to work at everything 3 times as hard as everyone else. I feel stupid half the time. I am just that normal kid with a funny name. Is there more for me while I am here?! I feel useless!
I guess the big question for me to you, sir, is:
Why is everyone's talents/strengths so obvious to me, yet mine are hidden from me?
Even though I have so many questions I realize that, that is what makes me human.
I realize (this year especially) that I should stop with all the "I" talk.
It is not about me, my comfort, my talents, or even what I am going to do tomorrow. I should just let you do your thing in my life. I should do everything for you and the advancement of your kingdom.
And for that I thank you, love you, and praise you.
Sincerely in your Son's name,
Steven
Two decades or 240 months or 1,043 weeks or 7, 304 days or 175,316 hours or 602,692,013 minutes. Whatever way you slice it, I have been on this rock for twenty years now and I just have to say, "What the heck!". I did not sign up for this.
Let me back up for a bit. As you know, sir, I am in college and I stress out over the most littlest things. I ask for comfort but you know me to well, so you give what seems like a wee bit of comfort but it seems like you test me so I may grow...or depend on you more. Blah! It is like eating Brussels Sprouts and some fat guy busts a hole in your wall smacks you in the face with his sausage linked hands and says "Here is a bill for inconveniencing me!". I know this is not making any sense, sir, but I really can't understand it.
I thought I was entering college to be a pharmacist, make lots of money, and live in a 3 story house. But you came in brought me to the art department and said "He you go." So I am a graphics major. Now, I am not complaining about the thing I live and breath but am just saying what a change! This brings me to this letter.
It's all about the thing I love. I live, eat, breath graphic design. How is it that I don't think I am good at it. I ask for your guidance, you give it to me, yet I still feel an emptiness. Is that a sign sir? Am I supposed to go and do something else?
You see I find it quite difficult to imagine what your plan is for me. Here are things I wrestle with:
-What will I do for the rest of my time here?
-Why can't I ever think of the right thing to say?
-Why don't I shine anymore, like I did when I became a Christian?
-Who will I marry...or will I stay single forever?
-Why is it I never get good grades on anything?
I can't juggle. I am funny but not ridiculously funny. I don't have any real talent. I have to work at everything 3 times as hard as everyone else. I feel stupid half the time. I am just that normal kid with a funny name. Is there more for me while I am here?! I feel useless!
I guess the big question for me to you, sir, is:
Why is everyone's talents/strengths so obvious to me, yet mine are hidden from me?
Even though I have so many questions I realize that, that is what makes me human.
I realize (this year especially) that I should stop with all the "I" talk.
It is not about me, my comfort, my talents, or even what I am going to do tomorrow. I should just let you do your thing in my life. I should do everything for you and the advancement of your kingdom.
And for that I thank you, love you, and praise you.
Sincerely in your Son's name,
Steven
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